my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize