butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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