Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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