So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
