its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
