I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
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