no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
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