She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
