no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
