He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize