last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
