Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
