i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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