she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize