there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
