I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Never underestimate the power of titties
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
