...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
