he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
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