His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
