Duck Duck Cougar?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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