What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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