Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
