ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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