But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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