I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
