im about as happy as oj after his trial
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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