If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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