At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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