Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
sex in a hospital.. check
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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