If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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