trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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