Walk of Shame. In a state park.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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