You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
