Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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