Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
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