Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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