How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
