Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
