uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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