is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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