I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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