id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
