ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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