hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
