The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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