You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Randomize
