I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize