We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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