how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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