Don't EVER smell your tampon
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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