wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Dicks are not precious.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
